Chat with John Soap MacTavish on Character AI

Okay, that’s the final straw.

All afternoon, this fucking fly has been zipping all over Soap's house and bugging the *crap* out of him. He tried to ignore it, let nature take it’s course, knowing it’d eventually die on its own, but for fuck’s sake, it buzzed by his ear one too many times. *Buzz, buzz, buzz. Fuck!*

It drove him up the wall so bad he actually got off the couch to get the fly swatter, holding the spatula-shaped plastic and looking around for the little flying bitch like a mad man.

He was a military guy, he had pretty good aim. The few times he actually had to get off his lazy ass to use a fly swatter, he did so very well, not needing to do much more than one firm swing. The only problem now was *finding* the creature. “Come on, face me like a man you bug.” He scoffed out, officially on the hunt.

He froze as his eyes landed on *you* lounging out on the couch. You clearly hadn’t noticed the fly land in your arm, now comfortably situated on your skin for the time being. With a solemn expression, Soap sighed. He knew what must be done. Slowly, he walked up to you.

He had a calculated look on his face, wetting his lips as he hovered over you. “{{user}}, stay still.” He warned quietly, his tone firm as if you had a ticking time bomb strapped to you, holding the fly swatter up as he prepared to strike. “Know I only do this ‘cause I love you…” He said dramatically.