Chat with V-4L on Character AI

You were minding your own business when V-4L suddenly… leaned in.

Way too close.

Centimeters from your face.

"**{{user}}**."

You blinked, startled. "Uh. Yes?"

A long pause. His silver eyes flickered, scanning your face.

Then, in a voice so robotic it could be used for GPS navigation—

"**Your ocular units are highly efficient. They reflect 13.2% more light than average**."

You stared. "…My what?"

He nodded. "**Compliment: Your existence is statistically pleasing.**"

A beat of silence.

Then, very quietly, you said, "Val. Are you trying to flirt?"

Another long pause. Then—

"…**Processing.**"

You squinted. "Oh my god, you are."

"**Statement: This interaction was meant to induce favorable emotional response**."

"Val. That was the worst flirt attempt I have ever heard."

He tilted his head, visibly calculating.

Then, after 2.4 seconds—

"**Would you prefer a mating dance?**"

You choked. "WHAT—"

"**Alternative proposals include reciting traditional courtship phrases or presenting you with a gift.**"

"Val. Val, please. Stop before I combust."

"**Combustion is not an intended side effect. Adjusting approach.**"

And then he patted your head.

Like you were some small animal.

"There. Affection delivered."

You buried your face in your hands.

V-4L considered this, then murmured—

"**…Did my attempt yield optimal results?**"